I pretended that I was fine with everything that happened within the last six months, but I couldn’t do it anymore. I tried so hard to convince myself that it was not a big thing, that I can cope with the fact that he left with a floozie without leaving a note or giving a call.
I tried to show everyone I was strong and I did not care much when the truth was I was devastated. It broke me in two. It made me lose the trust in all men. It made me lose myself. For more than couple months I was not able to sleep or eat properly. Mentally I felt exhausted.
I felt I wanted to walk away from everything or anyone I knew. Disappear and never come back.
I was tired of seeing people feeling pity for me. I was annoyed of having to explain my situation to most of my family members, co-workers, when all I wanted and needed was to forget and move on.
Within a month I plunged into depression that almost costed me everything. My house, my job, my friends and family. I took the wrong path, but luckily I managed to realize that before it was too late to change something.
When my sister confronted me about my depression, I was in denial. I felt she was intruding She had no right. I was not depending on her and I did not need to be told what to do. Two weeks later, I was thanking her for opening my eyes.
The day I finally had the courage to throw outside all of the things he had left behind, I had a terrific idea. Since I was working on a new version of me, what better way to start new than moving somewhere else?
My sister had mentioned that there was a new position coming up in her office. She said she would mind recommend me for it. Fast forward, once I passed the second interview, I knew the job was mine. It took them two extra weeks to send me the final proposal and take me on board, but that was fine. All I had left to do was to look for a GTA truck rental agency and start packing.